Millers Grind Out Another Win

Newark was bathed in roasting sunshine, as World Cup fever gripped the town. However, about thirty people decided to congregate for a cricket match instead, and the Millers were the visitors.
Rocket headed out for the toss, where the following conversation allegedly took place...

“Tails” says Rocket, as the toin is thrown up.
“Heads it is. What do you want to do?” responds the Newark captain.
“But you won the toss, so it’s your choice!” replies an incredulous Rocket.
“Oh yes, so we have. We’ll bat of course, and make your boys labour in the field in this heat”.

Delighted with this news, the Millers took the field – all nine of us. Big Daddy Baker had overdone wetting the baby’s head, but blamed the traffic, whilst Duncan Disorderly put in a no-show. Rumours spread that his romancing in The Key / Buzz some weeks earlier had paid dividends, and he’d not left his bedroom since.

Garland donned the gloves, but soon regretted it, as the ball spat more times than Voller and Rijkgaard. It was Slo-Mo Strong who made early inroads with his usual wicket taking filth. Senior spinner Graham showed his full array on the crap wicket, including two bouncers off a good length. He also made time for his customary debate with the umpire on the finer points of the LBW rule.

In the heat, the Millers were bouyed firstly by the appearance of the Newark masseuse, who was giving professional rubdowns on the boundary. However she packed up her kit before any Millers could pull their groins, although several were seen warming their hands in their pockets in the 30 degree heat. Things got even better when Ted Elliott appeared as our knight in shining armour to take the fielding side to 11. Failing to find a trusty white steed, Ted had travelled to the ground in his trusty white van - better suited to take the heavy load. He soon snaffled a fine catch, and chucked two more away. Geoff The Postman Tindsley followed Ted’s lead, but without the fine catch, as he firstly refused to catch one that nearly hit him on the head as he turned to chase it down, and then let go of a dolly having held it for about five minutes. However a professional performance restricted the Newark score to 147-9 at tea.

Tea was expected to be a fine affair, as Little Miss Muffett had been spotted coming out of the pavilion, resplendent in white pinny. However, the promise of curds of whey, became curds of woe, as tea, alongside England’s footy performance, left the Millers and Hanson in depressed mood.

In reply, the headline grabbing opening pair strode out. Graham was in usual fine fettle, scoring a rapid 47, but Parker soon departed to yet another interesting LBW. Despite the shabby treatment by his captain, who had dropped him to No3, and with sledging ringing in his ears from one particular Newark bowler, Laddy just did what he does best, and scored runs – 37 not out off 220 balls.

Meek talked his way up the order, as he needed to rush off to a wedding reception. Half an hour later, he was still nudging singles. Refusing to throw his wicket, he finally took a suicidal second run, and promptly blamed Laddy. His lengthy spell at the crease meant Meeky was more likely to see the wedding conception than any of the reception.
It was left to the specialist finisher Royal Birk (Dale) to see us home, leaving Laddy stranded when set fair for a ton. Another 20 points in the bag.

MOM : Bomber Graham
TFC : Geoff “The Postman” Tindsley
MOM Total : Garland 1, DJ Sammy 1, Bobby 1, Bomber 4, Big Tone 1, Grant 1